Wednesday, April 26, 2017

All you need

All you need to make a movie is a girl and a gun.



Girl Scouts, 1920.

Armenian fighters, 1895.

Annie Oakley, 1922, age 62.
1925 Drexel Institute Girls Rifle Team.
Claudia Cardinale, Once Upon a Time in the West.
Lillian Gish, Night of the Hunter.


Vietnamese girl captures USAF Lt. 1967.
Assembling submachine guns in Leningrad, 1943.
Soviet sniper Roza Shanina
Roza Shanina 8 days before her death.
Greek partisan.
Lyudmila Pavlichenko, killed at least 309 Nazis.
Soviet women snipers--over 700 confirmed
kills between them.

Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Pasolini's Medea (1969)

  
I watched Pasolini's Medea for the first time in years. It was easier to understand having seen Jason and the Argonauts as a child, but reading about it (the play, the movie and the myth in general) on Wikipedia clarified some things I didn't understand. For example, Medea dismembers her brother and leaves his body parts strewn about so her father, who was pursuing her, would have to stop and take time to pick them up.

Maybe if the rest of the movie had been clearer to me, like why she hacked her brother to death, I would have been less understanding about her actions at the end. Still, I don't remember Jason being such a jerk in the other movie.

Opera star Maria Callas in the title role (doesn't sing.)

In the beginning, the cintar tells 5-year-old Jason a story. It's difficult to understand, he says, because it's full of deeds, not thoughts.

Admirers of the movie might think I'm an idiot, but (maybe) approach it like an opera. I heard this guy on the radio say that the way you go to the opera is that you read all about it, learn the storyline before you go so you can relax and enjoy the music, because you're never going to follow the plot by listening to the lyrics.

Available on Fandor.

Friday, April 21, 2017

Gallagher


There are celebrities I don't like. Some are extremely successful, like Tom Cruise, but others are in sad decline and I feel guilty for not liking them. So it's such a relief when they turn out to be horrible people I can freely hate.

I don't know how I got into this, but I listened to a couple of interviews with '80s comedy sensation Gallagher on YouTube.

Gallagher was a prop comic who was huge in the '80's. He had 14 specials on Showtime in his day. I only saw one. His thing was smashing watermelons with a sledge hammer. That's how he would end each show.

Gallagher is now 70. He hasn't modified his look since the 1980s. Bald on top with long hair on the sides.

But he's turned angry, bitter and racist, attacking Arabs, Jews, Mexicans, gays, lesbians, and I don't know who else. He also attacks other comedians all of whom he considers his inferiors. He's outraged that comics drink water on stage.

Marc Maron interviewed him on his podcast. It didn't go well. Maron seemed to feel bad about it. He spoke at length before playing the recorded interview (which Gallagher walked out on.) He didn't know Gallagher and Gallagher seemed to know nothing about him. But their agents spoke and they were both in Portland, Oregon, at the same time, so they did the interview in Maron's hotel room.

Gallagher said he had been out to make a lot of money but didn't see how this shaped his career. He couldn't understand why he didn't have a talk show. I don't necessarily think he felt entitled to one, but, as Maron said, he seemed to lack self-awareness. He didn't know how he ended up where he is today, and he doesn't understand why he was being attacked for his anti-gay or anti-Arab jokes. He mentioned an anti-Semitic joke perhaps not knowing Maron was Jewish.

"Can we tell a Jew joke that they don't want to pay?" Gallagher said.

"Why?" Maron said. "It's not true."

"It's not true---why do people laugh?"

"Because it's a stereotype, that's been established. Most people that laugh at those jokes don't have a Jew in their life."

Here is Galagher on Opie and Anthony. The late Patrice O'Neal tries to be helpful, advising Gallagher to update his look, quit the melon thing and use his full name.

And here is Marc Maron on Opie and Anthony discussing his interview with Gallagher.

They All Laughed

By the way, there was Peter Bogdanovich's 1980's movie, They All Laughed. It wasn't bad, but it was a disaster at the box office for various reasons. I watched it and thought one of the characters was modeled on Gallagher, a frizzy-haired adult on roller skates. It stood as grim testament to Gallagher's popularity at the time.

And another thing----I mentioned Gallagher's outrage at comics drinking water on stage. Didn't Steve Martin, a bit of a prop comic himself, do a thing back then----he would take a drink of water, spill a little on the stage and think it didn't matter, then he would grab the mic stand and pretend to be electrocuted. Drinking water isn't a new thing.

Thursday, April 20, 2017

Again with the westerns

High Noon would have been pretty good if
Gary Cooper hadn't been wearing that stupid-looking tie.

Like I say, I never liked westerns. They're about ugly people wearing ugly clothes in ugly towns. I can't stand those ties men wear in them. The showgirls wear awful-looking outfits. The people are either illiterate or they may as well be. Their only recreation is hanging around in often garish saloons and their greatest ambition in life is to some day own a ranch.

But I find westerns weirdly fascinating. Why were they so popular outside the United States? What did Josef Stalin see in them? The Dalai Lama liked westerns and said his favorite actor was John Wayne. (Poor Richard Gere.)

In the '60's and '70's, the Soviets made their own "westerns" which I liked, set in Kazakhstan or Siberia in the 1920s. I used to like samurai movies. And there are a lot of foreign films set in various times and places that, if you wanted to make an American version, could best be done as westerns.

I think of Night of the Shooting Stars, Okraina, The Virgin Spring.

Last House on the Left was an Americanized version of The Virgin Spring which didn't work terribly well. The Virgin Spring itself was based on a medieval ballad that was probably closer to Oedipus Rex than anything else.

In the ballad, three sisters on their way to church are killed by three goatherd brothers they just met. They're killed because they refuse to marry them. The three murderers try to sell the girls' dresses to a farmer's wife. She recognizes the dresses as her daughters'. She screams for her husband who comes out with a sword. He kills two of the brothers outright then demands that the third one tell him who they are. He says that they were abandoned in the woods as children and had been fending for themselves ever since, and the father realizes they're his sons who he inexplicably left to die in the wilderness years earlier.

I don't know if medieval Swedes had access to ancient Greek drama, or if it was a coincidence. 

Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Class division

A photo showing the class divide in Britain in 1937.

Strange that boys were considered lower class if they wore sport jackets.

Like the scene on Rebel Without a Cause where James Dean goes to high school wearing slacks and a tweed jacket. At least it wasn't a blazer. 

Saturday, April 15, 2017

The new Mystery Science Theater 3000



I see that Mystery Science Theater 3000 is coming back with a new cast on Netflix. I was surprised how saddened I was when the show went off the air years ago, but I have mixed feelings about it coming back.

For one thing, Rifftrax proved that you can do the same thing to successful, big budget movies, too. Making fun of low budget movies just seems cruel.

Back when they were still on the SciFi channel, I made the mistake of looking at their website. I read the user comments. It seems that many of the fans enjoyed the show because they thought they were punishing people for making movies that weren't very good. They weren't laughing because the show was funny, they were laughing as they imagined the reaction of the people being ridiculed.

Then I watched a video on YouTube of some of the cast in a talk show appearance with a film historian who thought that some of the movies they attacked were pretty good.

Comedians are just annoying when they argue with regular people. They're overbearing, if they can't make an argument they make a joke, if there's a glaring hole in their argument they cover it with a joke and if they lose on some point, they make a joke and think they won.
 
And by the way, in Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie, Mike Nelson's acting was quite bad. If it had been any other movie, they'd be mocking him. I felt sorry for Joel Hodgson leaving the show and then seeing them make a big movie out of it.

I was a little surprised when it dawned on me that Joel Hodgson was a prop comic. I've never seen Carrot Top perform and never wanted to, but maybe I should give him a chance. Hodgson hates Gallagher.

Finally, there was a thing they did on both Rifftrax and MST3k. They would shout the name of a well-known black person whenever a black character appeared in the movie. It would be nice if they quit that.

Friday, April 14, 2017

Veterans hated John Wayne


I don't think people know this now, but a lot of World War Two veterans couldn't stand John Wayne. They hated him because he dodged the draft while playing a war hero in the movies.

Back in the '70s, when we had local talk radio, war veterans would call in and talk about it.

There are different explanations for Wayne staying out of the war. One was that his career was just beginning to take off when the US entered the war and he didn't want to join right then, then his career was going so well he didn't want to walk away and join the Army.
 
When he appeared before his draft board, he argued that he was the sole support for his wife and children. He didn't mention that he was about to get divorced because he was sleeping with Marlene Dietrich. He falsely claimed that a studio threatened to sue him if he got drafted and he later said he thought he could better serve his country by being a movie star.

Everyone knew he was a draft dodger. I don't blame him. But that may be one reason he became such a rabid McCarthyite in the '50s. He thought it would make up for it. He blamed the Communists for his not getting an Oscar (he finally got one in 1969). He couldn't imagine it was because of his lousy acting. He told Playboy magazine that he was a white supremacist.

I never understood his appeal. I never liked his looks, he walked funny and had weird speech patterns. But looking at some of the terrible cowboy stars of the '30s and '40s, maybe he wasn't so bad.

Thursday, April 13, 2017

The magic of Wu Wei

It's important not to try too hard. Or at all.

When I was in high school, I was sitting there in European history class. The teacher handed out a test. There were a number of questions typed on a sheet and we were supposed to write little essays, which I did, obviously.

But, sitting next to me was this kid who was writing his "essays" in tiny print in the space between the lines on the sheet.

Later, when we got the tests back, he got a better grade than me.

Sean Spicer, Hitler

From an article by Robert Fisk:
It’s not just a question of leaving Hitler’s ghost alone; never, ever, compare anything to the horrors Hitler unleashed on the world in the Second World War. Obviously, if the White House really wanted to dump on Assad – whose name, I notice, they still cannot pronounce correctly – it should have compared the Syrian President with Saddam Hussein, who really did use gas “against his own people”.

But there’s a problem there, too. Because the moment you mention Saddam, you recall for your audience all the lies and “fake news” the George W Bush White House spewed out about the Iraqi dictator before its illegal 2003 invasion – “fake news” assisted at the time, let us remember, by The New York Times. And then you also remind your audience that the whole Iraqi adventure ended in a bloodbath for Iraqis and utter catastrophe for the United States. So Saddam is out – and Hitler has to be brought back to life yet again.

And yes, we compared Saddam to Hitler. Indeed another well known chump, the son of our present Queen, reportedly told a woman who had lost relatives in the Holocaust that Putin was doing in Ukraine “just about the same as Hitler”. Moscow called this “outrageous”. That was almost exactly two years ago.
Read the whole thing here.

Tuesday, April 11, 2017

Sherman's March



Long ago, I had been contemplating how it would be impossible to make any kind of movie without hundreds of thousands of dollars. But then I went to the local art theater to see Sherman's March. It was a documentary. The filmmaker's girlfriend dumps him. He had received a grant to make a documentary about the lingering effects in the south of Sherman's March to the Sea but instead makes a quasi-cinema verite film about trying to meet women.

He walked around with a 16mm camera on one shoulder and a tape recorder on the other, and I sat there watching this thinking that the sound and picture seemed passable enough. Maybe one could make a narrative feature film with nothing but a camera and a tape recorder.

This revelation did me no good at all. A movie would still have cost more than I could have come up with and that was just as well. Most young filmmakers seem to be bankrolled by their parents.

Anyway, Sherman's March is available on Fandor. It was pretty good.

Saturday, April 8, 2017

Hangings in westerns

 
It seems really morbid. I've seen two westerns where they keep talking about hanging people.

One was John Wayne's Angel and the Badman. Harry Carey plays the marshal who appears periodically. Each time, he tells John Wayne that he hopes to hang him some day.

Bill Cody, Andy Shuford

The other was Mason of the Mounties starring a man-boy western duo, Bill Cody and Andy Shuford. They starred together in a number of B westerns. The men in the movie keep talking about all the horse thieves they've lynched and when they finally catch the criminal in the end, they debate whether he should be taken to Canada to be hanged or hanged there in the United States.

Apparently carrying out executions was once considered normal. There was an episode of Bonanza where the Cartwrights think nothing of hanging a guy themselves when the sheriff who was about to execute him gets killed.

I've never seen it, but I read that an early version of the government's Civil Defense Handbook included instructions on how to carry out executions after a nuclear war.

I guess it's why lynching was so popular. I can't imagine any normal person doing that.

In Paths of Glory, a French guy is horrified when Kirk Douglas makes him participate in a firing squad. That's more the reaction I would expect.

Friday, April 7, 2017

Democrats love Trump's hate

The only thing I didn't hate about Donald Trump was that he was less apt to bomb Syria and start a war with Russia than Clinton. Clinton's only real campaign promise was to start World War Three.

But Bush and Obama both claimed to oppose wars, too, when they were running and they both pretended that they wanted to improve relations with Russia, just like Trump, and look how they turned out.

The morons at MSNBC were perfectly happy about Trump's attack on Syria, of course. None of them questioned the claim that there was a chemical attack by the Syrian government. We have no way of knowing what happened because no reporter would dare step foot in ISIS-controlled territory. The Russians concluded that Syrian bombing damaged a chemical weapons storage site used by ISIS which is a far more plausible explanation. The thing that should terrify us is that ISIS has nerve gas.

Thursday, April 6, 2017

Roman Polanski

Polanski leaving the courthouse, 1977

A court in Los Angeles has denied a request from Roman Polanski to resolve the 1977 sex abuse case against him in his absence. Polanski wanted to know whether or not he'd go to prison if he returned to the United States. 

When Polanski was arrested in 1977, I didn't know who he was and didn't follow the story at all. Most of what I knew about the case came from a comic strip in National Lampoon. It wasn't until recently that I learned the details and that was from the HBO documentary. I won't go into it, but it was rather appalling.

I can understand the people who still want Polanski put in prison forty years later. I can also understand the people who are fine with him continuing to walk around free. But I can't understand the people who are anxious for him to be able to return to the United States. Even if you think his crime was relatively innocuous as Whoopi Goldberg apparently does ("it wasn't rape rape") why would they want him back here? Do they think it's a gross injustice that Polanski is forced to live as a French millionaire and not a California millionaire?

I think he was a jerk for leaving Poland. They gave him his education at public expense, made him a director and paid for him to make his movies. How many people with his background, impoverished after barely surviving the war, would have gotten those opportunities in a capitalist country? You think Knife in the Water could have been made in Hollywood? He didn't come to the West because he was such an artiste. He came here to grub for money.
 
My impression was that any good director could have made Chinatown. Rosemary's Baby was more uniquely his, but I can't see how it or any other movie was such a boon to mankind that the director should be immune from prosecution.

I'm tired of U.S. cultural imperialism anyway. If he's a great director, let him be a great director in one of his own countries, France or Poland.

Shia LaBeouf's movie, Man Down, sells just three tickets in England


Shia LaBeouf (right, with the weird-shaped head.)

Young filmmakers dream of getting their movies into theatrical release. But the dream can turn into a nightmare.

Look at Shia LaBeouf's new movie, Man Down, directed by Dito [sic] Montiel. It opened in a single theater in a town called Burnley in the north of England and it sold a single ticket. It ran for a week and sold two additional tickets. It grossed the equivalent of $28 (£21.)

According to the internet:
LaBeouf, who reportedly has a net worth of $25 million, isn’t the only big name to tank at the box office in Britain in recent history. In March, Pierce Brosnan’s latest movie, I.T., opened with just $416.50 (£343) over its opening weekend at the U.K. box office - that’s an average take of $38 (£31) per theater. Last year, Beauty and the Beast’s Emma Watson’s The Colony took just $61 (£47) over its opening weekend in the U.K. and grossed $15,700 during its entire domestic run. A few months earlier, Regression, in which she starred alongside Ethan Hawke, made $55,000 at the domestic box office but fared better in the U.K. ringing up $329,170 in ticket sales. Rather interestingly, both The Colony and Man Down have been distributed in the U.K. by Signature - the company is about to release Aftermath, the $10.5 million budget drama starring another former box office behemoth, Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Chemical weapons in Syria

So, Russia bombed ISIS in Syria and apparently damaged a rebel chemical weapons storage site releasing poison gas which killed at least 70 people.

But the lapdog press in the US is claiming that Syria launched a chemical attack and has condemned Russia and Iran for supporting them.

Syria is winning the war. They have ISIS and the "rebels" largely defeated. Why would they use chemical weapons now?

The terrifying thing is that ISIS has chemical weapons and it doesn't seem to bother anyone.

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Celebrities smoking

Tony Curtis wisely abstains from smoking
as he hangs around with Lawrence Olivier
and Peter Ustinov. And those two were
supposed to be the smart ones.

Luis Bunuel foolishly smoking in Toledo, Spain,
on the set if Tristana.

Toshiro Mifune and Tatsuya Nakadai 
stand around smoking on the set of Sanjuro.
Martin Sheen smoking on the set of 
Apocalypse Now. No wonder he had
a heart attack.

Even innocent Sissy Spacek 
takes a smoke break on the set
of Carrie.

Monday, April 3, 2017

Kelly Reichardt, River of Grass


So, okay, I watched this movie, River of Grass, on Fandor. It was pretty good. Kelly Reichardt's first movie set outside her hometown of Miami.

A young mother leaves her baby home alone and starts hanging around with a scumbag she met in a bar. After an unfortunate handgun incident, they wisely decide to flee Florida but don't have the money to do so. Meanwhile, her jazz drummer police detective father searches for the service revolver he somehow lost.

Sort of an arthouse version of Aloha, Bobby & Rose.

Considering the storyline, the movie made Florida look pretty good. The little motels they drove past looked nice. A cops speaks to them after they try to run a toll booth and is surprisingly polite under the circumstances.

Jon Jost blogged some time back that people told him that Kelly Reichardt's movies were sort of like his, so he watched her movies but couldn't see the similarity. I didn't either, at least not in this case. There was another movie of hers, Wendy and Lucy, that might have been more Jon Jost-like. Both that and River and Grass were about people who wanted to leave the state but didn't have the means to do so. That was also true of her western, Meek's Cutoff which took place on the Oregon Trail.

Sunday, April 2, 2017

Anthony Weiner alarms parents

 
Parents in New York complained to school officials that Zionist sex deviant Anthony Weiner was spotted lurking around their children's schoolyard.

It seems that Weiner and his dangerously tolerant wife, Huma Abedin, are together again and that Weiner had been picking up their five-year-old son from preschool. The school made him stop doing it when horrified parents complained.

It's being reported that the Clinton campaign insisted that Huma dump Weiner if she wanted to keep working on the campaign and now she's free to return to the man she loves. I don't know if this will affect the potential criminal charges against him, but they say the more time passes, the less likely he is to be charged.

I thought Weiner left sexting rehab due to lack of money, but now they say he completed treatment, so who knows.

Weiner is rabidly pro-Israel. It doesn't bother him that his marriage is illegal in Israel and that his Muslim wife and child are not considered fully human there.

It's being reported, by the way, that Abedin was given the task of pre-planning Hillary Clinton's funeral in 2010.

Bella Vista (2013)

Bella Vista was the first feature made by Vera Brunner-Sung who was known for experimental documentaries. She raised $31,000 online. Shot in twelve days in Missoula where she teachers at the University of Montana.

It's starts with a woman who teaches English to foreign students at the university. Like Brunner-Sung herself, she and her students have to adapt to living in a new town. Perhaps not surprisingly, the kids cope better than their teacher.

I used to think that, if you're going to make a movie in a place like Missoula, you ought to be able to make your money back just from the locals if you do it cheap enough with a local cast. Every friend and relative of everyone in the movie would HAVE to attend. Look at the way people pack into community theaters and high school plays. But that may not work in an era of You Tube and Community Access TV. Moving pictures aren't much of a novelty anymore.

Anyway, a pretty good arthouse film, beautifully photographed. Available on Fandor.

Friday, March 31, 2017

People being hit in the head

 
I used to like The Way of the Dragon aka The Return of the Dragon, (it was going to be called Enter the Dragon but Warner Brothers stole the title.)

Now it bothers me, that scene with all those mafia guys getting hit in the head over and over with nunchucks.

When I was 10 or 12, Judo was all there was. There were no karate schools around here. Now all there is is karate and you couldn't study Judo to save your life. And, ever since Taekwondo became an Olympic sport, all the karate schools started calling themselves Taekwondo schools. Like there's a difference.

I knew a guy who wanted to learn Judo. I told him that karate was supposed to be more effective. He said he didn't want to hit anyone. I told him he could cause more serious injuries throwing people to the ground with Judo that he would hitting them with karate. He said he was fine with with hurting people as long as he didn't have to hit them. Now I understand what he meant.

Now I think Judo is the way to go. You don't learn martial arts just to beat people up; you learn martial arts to beat people up in a surprising way. Karate is so common that no one is going to be bewildered by it anymore.

But when I was a kid, there would be these kids who knew Judo. You'd be standing there and the next instant you were on the ground looking up at them and you had no idea how it happened.

Junior high yearbooks

I came across some yearbooks online from my old junior high school. It's been so many years. The teachers look so young to me now. I was surprised that the janitor from my grade school had been working at the junior high at the time. I never saw him there, or maybe I callously walked right past him and didn't deign to notice. I do remember wondering later why janitors all looked alike.

The kids looked younger than I remember, which started to really depress me. At the time, I thought we were basically adults. Now they look like children and the horrible things that happened to some of them seem so much worse now.

+ There was a kid who was picked on all the time. A few years later, I sat next to him in a class in high school and he kept talking about shooting people with .44 magnums with hollow point bullets. He and his brother both became car thieves in high school. His older brother stayed out of prison, but he was locked up for a few years.

+  A kid who struggled with a serious drug problem and killed himself by jumping into the river.

+ There was a boy, a friend of my brother's, who had several pictures in the yearbook. Everyone liked him. His mother died after a long illness. A few days later, his father disappeared. He had walked into the woods and killed himself.

+ A kid whose drunken father would come home and beat him with a baseball bat. Sometimes his mother would protect him, sometime she wouldn't. He became a drug addict later.

+ A kid who really wasn't very bright. He had a girlfriend who was in high school who couldn't have been very bright either. He didn't come right out and tell us, but he joked and broadly hinted that they had gone into the woods to consummate their relationship. Later, he joked and broadly hinted that she was pregnant. And quite some time later, without explanation, he started making jokes about babies and their bodily functions.

+ A kid who died of an overdose in his 20's.

+ Kids who were friendless and picked on.

+ A kid who must have had some sort of glandular disorder and was walking around with big bushy beard when he was thirteen. He was happy with it. He would hang around in bars.

+ A boy who survived the Khmer Rouge.

+ A Vietnamese girl whose father bribed a guy with gold for the family to emigrate

+ A kid who was propositioned by a man in a park.

+ A kid who said his grandmother made him to go out in the yard to get her a switch. He brought her a dried up stick he found on the ground but she demanded a BETTER switch. He used the cord from the venetian blinds to demonstrate how hard she hit him.

+ A kid who kept missing school due to arthritis.

+ A girl whose grandmother took her for a ride in her new airplane and had to get out the owners manual to find out how to land.

+ A teacher who was taken to the hospital when some young scamps spiked his coffee with LSD.

+ A homely kid the teachers openly hated.

+ There was a kid who would always accuse people of "hassling" him. "Are you hassling me? Are you giving me a hassle?" he would say. He said this a lot. He had little scars that kept appearing on his face. A girl said his father abused him, but I don't know how she knew.

Those are just the ones I knew about and I really didn't know much about what was going on.

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Wyatt Earp, Hollywood, 1923


Wyatt Earp at home in Hollywood, 1923

Wyatt Earp went to Hollywood hoping to cash in on movie westerns. Worked as an adviser. I read somewhere he helped choreograph gun fights. He also hung around with a young John Wayne who imitated Earp's walk and his way of speaking.

Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Sunday, March 26, 2017

Shotgun Slade

 
Kurosawa's Yojimbo was inspired in part by the work of Dashiell Hammett. It had a seemingly amoral hero who deals with criminals on their own terms and defeats them. Part of the plot was inspired directly by The Glass Key. And it was remade as A Fistful of Dollars, so the private eye genre did have an indirect influence on westerns in the 1960s.  

And, before that, there was Shotgun Slade, a half-hour TV western that aired from 1959-1961.

Apparently private eye shows were edging out westerns on TV at the time, so they compromised. They made a western about a "private detective" in the old west whose weapon is a shotgun-rifle combination.

Had a jazz soundtrack which was pretty good for a western. It really wasn't bad. In an episode I saw, Shotgun Slade brings a weaselly guy who embezzled thousands of dollars from a children's charity to justice and thwarts some train robbers in the process.


Might have been just as well without the combination shotgun/rifle gimmick, though. For one thing, he has to walk around carrying this thing all the time.

Again, the show is public domain. Available on streaming video.

Saturday, March 25, 2017

Annie Oakley (1954-1957)

 
I don't know what's wrong with me, but I was watching another 1950s western, Annie Oakley, with Gail Davis in the title role. Less adult than some other westerns. Entirely fictional, nothing in the show related in any way to the life of the real Annie Oakley except that she wore a ridiculous western cowgirl costume and could shoot really well.

In the introduction, we see Annie standing up on the back of a galloping horse firing a gun and precisely shooting a hole in the middle of a playing card a man was holding in his hand.

And yet she never shoots anyone.


In one episode she leaps from a horse onto a moving stage coach being chased by criminals who are shooting at them and had just killed the driver. Annie grabs reins and lets the stage coach guy ineffectually shoot at the criminals until he gets killed, too. Obviously she should have let him drive. She could have effortlessly killed those guys.

She shoots guns out of people's hands and that's about all. She gets kidnapped, her little brother gets kidnapped, and she still doesn't shoot anyone.

It wasn't that they were trying to be non-violent. They had murders in every episode, some of them witnessed by her preteen brother. The kids' uncle is sheriff and he goes around punching people in the face even when conflicts could have easily been resolved.

They just never let women shoot people on these westerns.

One time, on The Big Valley, Miss Barbara Stanwyck was kidnapped and held for days. She finally got her hands on a gun and even then all she did was hold them at bay. They still wouldn't let her kill anybody.

Reportedly, Annie Oakley would have continued at least one more season, but Jimmy Hawkins who played her brother hit his adolescent growth spurt, although I don't know why that should have ended it.

The show is now public domain and available on streaming video.

Jimmy Hawkins (left) as Tagg being menaced.

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Justin Bieber has another great big tattoo

Justin Bieber. He uses Regular Scent 
Speed Stick apparently. The tattoo on
his stomach is the new one.

He was such a lovely boy. Which may be the problem. How many boys want to be "lovely"? So Justin Bieber uglied himself up by plastering himself with tattoos like an idiot.

Bieber was in a couple of episodes of CSI when he was sixteen or seventeen. One of the women on the show told reporters that he was a brat which caused her some negative feedback, so she backed down and said that he was really a pretty good actor, a natural talent. The boy could have had that to fall back on. He could have been a singer-turned-actor. But how many movies would Frank Sinatra have done if he had had tattoos all over him? You think David Cassidy would have gotten on The Partridge Family looking like that?

Let's face it: Tattoos are for dummies.

One of the problems is that once they have them, it's too late to do anything about it so people have to be polite and not point out that they've permanently disfigured themselves. 

How many of these people have gone out and gotten more and more tattoos because people politely pretended to like them?

Justin Bieber's degenerate father started getting him tattoos when he was fifteen. Imagine the mind that would do that. Years ago, two subhumans used India ink and a needle to tattoo their screaming, sobbing 8-year-old nephew. Tattooed his name, Billy, on his arm. They went to prison like Bieber's father should have.

I had a friend in junior high school who had a tiny "J" on his arm. It looked like he wrote it with blue ballpoint pen, but it was always there. I finally asked him about it. He mocked me for thinking he had written it on his arm---how ridiculous! Why would anyone write a letter J on their arm with a pen! He explained he tattooed himself. He was going to write his whole name, but it was so painful he stopped at the first letter. Which was just as well. Why would you want a tattoo of your own name? It's only slightly stupider than people tattooing their children's birth dates on themselves. Are they worried they'll forget? And that's only slightly stupider than Angelina Jolie tattooing the geographic coordinates of her children's places of birth on her arm. Where they were conceived would be more interesting. She may be even dumber than her cretinous father. She has "Know your rights" tattooed on her back. It should say "Don't be a flaming jackass".

 Boston, England, 1974

Saturday, March 18, 2017

John Rayne Rivello, Kurt Eichenwald


 Kurt Eichenwald

Years ago, there was an "art film" made by splicing clear and opaque film leader together. The film consisted entirely of light flashing on screen, and it contained a warning at the beginning that it could cause epileptic seizures. Apparently the filmmaker thought that a few potentially fatal seizures in audience members was a reasonable price to pay for such a great work of art.

The warning at the beginning of the film included a statistic that it could induce seizures in one in every so many thousand people. So few people saw the thing, it's unlikely it triggered anything.

But there was a cartoon broadcast on TV in Japan that did trigger seizures in a number of people. In fact, when the Simpsons went to Japan, they used this as a gag, like it was a regular feature of Japanese television.

So anyway, an anti-Semitic Trump supporter calling himself "Jew Goldstein" was arrested for sending a flashing GIF to journalist Kurt Eichenwald. Eichenwald is known to have epilepsy. It triggered a seizure.

Since then, Eichenwald received the same image from 40 other Trump enthusiasts.

"Jew Goldstein's" real name is John Rayne Rivello of Salisbury, Maryland. The FBI arrested him and will send him to Dallas where Eichenwald lives. He is charged with criminal cyberstalking with the intent to kill or cause bodily harm. He faces ten years in prison.

John Rayne Rivello's mugshot. Poor fool.

Pic the FBI found of him before 
he cleaned himself up for his mugshot.

I don't know why anti-Semites are using Jewish names online, but I've seen the same thing with anti-Arab racists.

Eichenwald is an Episcopalian, by the way.

According to the Justice Department:

"...Evidence received pursuant to a search warrant showed Rivello’s Twitter account contained direct messages from Rivello’s account to other Twitter users concerning the victim.  Among those direct messages included statements by Rivello, including 'I hope this sends him into a seizure,' 'Spammed this at [victim] let’s see if he dies,' and 'I know he has epilepsy.'

"Additional evidence received pursuant to a search warrant showed Rivello’s iCloud account contained a screenshot of a Wikipedia page for the victim, which had been altered to show a fake obituary with the date of death listed as Dec. 16, 2016.

"Rivello’s iCloud account also contained screen shots from epilepsy.com with a list of commonly reported epilepsy seizure triggers and from dallasobserver.com discussing the victim’s report to the Dallas Police Department and his attempt to identify the Twitter user."

Eichenwald was incapacitated for several days, lost the feeling in one hand and had trouble speaking for several weeks as a result.

So now there's a crowd-funding site raising money for Rivello's defense. Here are some comments from Rivello's supporters:
Kikenwald will lose this case based on his DOCUMENTED actions (drunk as fuck, sleep & medicine deprived), then he will get counter sued. These yids need to be put in their place.
You forget criminal cases generally bankrupt "little people".
This fucker is doing this explicitly to ruin the life of someone with far less money and power.
We need constitutional amendments against crap like this.
Why is the ADL not supporting this victim of anti-semitism, Mr. Goldstein? I can't believe Aryan monsters like Eichenwald (Buchenwald???)!

I imagine that if I pretended I had a seizure bc some guy sent me a fucking GIF over twitter and then I tried to sic the fbi on them that the fbi would no doubt tell me to go fuck my self and quit wasting their time.

Of course not you goyim peasant.

John "Jew Goldstein" Rivello did nothing wrong.

Gas The Kikes, Race War Now

I am new to this story but if a Jew died then that is FANTABULOUS!

Wouldn't it be easier to hire a BLM thug to "discuss" Mr Kikenwald's white privilege in a back alley somewhere?

jews aren't white- AH covered this 80 years ago

Well, one of them's going to prison. Forty others have done the same thing. We'll see if the FBI hunts them down as well. It can't be that hard.