Modern Family

I've grown weary of Modern Family. It's a bit like Arrested Development in that the characters each have a single quirk they use in every episode. I looked online and was surprised that everyone liked Phil so much and really hated Manny.

I liked Luke as a child. Being dumb and insensitive can be cute in children but is alarming in adults, especially body builders. There was an episode where he takes a pro-date rape position in an argument with Manny.

But, look, each episode is 21 minutes when you take out commercials and each one has a main plot and two subplots which are given equal emphasis. So the episodes cut between three storylines that are about seven minutes each. They imply a lot more than they show and cover the gaping holes in the plot by cutting away to another storyline.

It reminds me of that interview I saw with one of the producers of Baywatch. The interviewer was terribly impressed that the guy had written an episode, but the producer dismissed it.

A script is three minute scenes, he said. I can write a three minute scene.

If you can write a seven page script, you can write a script with this structure.

They did this to some degree on the old half-hour TV dramas.

It occurred to me that this would be an easy way to write a script for a short film. I googled it and found that someone else had the same revelation. I don't know if I should feel bad that I didn't have a unique idea or think that I'm not so dumb since someone else had the same thought.

I watched a seven minute video on YouTube made by teenagers. It was based on a Hardy Boys book. If they could intercut it with a Nancy Drew story they'd really have something. I can't think of a third teenage detective.

A vaguely painful memory

Now a strange memory is coming back to me. I was in high school. My friends were laughing at me. One of them had drawn a picture of me saying, "I'm not so dumb!" The cartoon implied that I had a really avid interest in the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes. What did they mean? What were they suggesting?